We've had a disaster on board
There's egg all over the floor
The omelette pan took a dive
When a boat went past full bore

We thought our ropes secure
And that we couldn't possibly move
But said pan was on the middle ring
And it didn't stay in the groove

We've all got that ring on our hob
That's really not fit for purpose
Like trying to balance a saucer
On the back of a moving tortoise

It's a lot like living in a jelly
Stuff slides and shifts about
If someone goes past too fast
Cupboards open and things fly out

Now many shout at the boaters
that seem like they are in a race
And those that are not on tickover
Risk getting my egg on their face

If you're a boater with the zoomies
And behind you there is a wake
Lay off the throttle at moored boats
To reduce the chance of a culinary mishap.
For heavens sake