During the last couple of years of my Mum’s life (when she was in her late 70s), I’d sometimes ask if she wanted to go out for lunch or come to us for dinner on a particular day and she’d refuse because she was going to the dentist/doctors/opticians that morning; it used to drive me crazy and I’d say to her ‘you can do more than one thing a day Mum’. I was so caught up in the busyness of my own life that I had little patience for anyone who wasn’t living their life at 100mph.

I so regret my attitude and behaviour now my life has changed so much and I can totally relate to wanting to live life at a different pace. For me, it has little to do with getting older and everything to do with choosing not to see busyness as a badge of honour.

My identity used to revolve around trying to pack in as much as I could each and every day and although being very busy and productive clearly fulfilled a need within me, it didn’t truly make me happy; I definitely wasn’t appreciating the present moment, but looking forward to all manner of planned events in the future.

When we sold our house, we spent 8 months living in our touring caravan whilst our narrow boat was being built. Moving into the caravan coincided with another lockdown in November 2020, so life changed dramatically.

When we sold our house, we spent 8 months living in our touring caravan whilst our narrow boat was being built. Moving into the caravan coincided with another lockdown in November 2020, so life changed dramatically.

Mum died in 2019, I was no longer working, we’d sold the house, we were in the middle of a pandemic and we had a narrow boat under construction despite having no boating experience whatsoever.

Sometimes life gives us opportunities for change that take time to understand, let alone embrace; when we’ve always lived life at breakneck speed, we need to adopt a change of pace before we can relax into a different way of life.

Of course, not everyone would make the choices I’ve made; living on a boat isn’t everyone’s idea of a good time, but we loved living in our caravan for those 8 months, so we were confident living on a boat would suit us just fine.

I now understand (and have adopted) my Mum’s ‘one thing a day’ attitude to life. I’m finding removing the need to be productive or to ‘achieve’ allows me to approach each day as it comes and enjoy the day as it unfolds; there are many days when I have no plans at all, yet seem to occupy myself and enjoy the simple things in life. I’m under no illusion that being retired allows me to live the lifestyle I choose, but it is a choice; many people choose to be busy at this age and that suits them too.

This week, we’re on a canal that we love and it’s close to where we lived in the caravan; we know where the best pubs, cafes, farm shops and walks are, so we’ve been able to stop and appreciate everything along the way.

The countryside is beautiful in this area and it’s a joy to walk along local footpaths listening to the sound of crisp newly fallen leaves underfoot. It’s lovely to walk in the afternoon and to see the milky late afternoon light gently envelop the fields as the sun sets…a real joy.

Some of my ‘one things a day’ this week have been a mocha coffee (literally the best mocha anywhere) and a bacon roll in a favourite cafe, several walks through much loved villages, lunch in a local gastropub, yoga (3 times!) on the towpath and chatting with a local lady who we met in lockdown when we were waiting for the boat to be built.

My Mum used to text me sometimes saying ‘I’m enjoying a G & T’ late in the afternoon and I always loved that she said ‘enjoying’ rather than ‘having’ a G & T. Although I had a busy life filled with regular holidays and a job I loved, I wonder how much I allowed myself to ‘enjoy’ those experiences in the moment. My propensity towards performing and perfectionism meant my mind was often tied up in either the past or the future; I was so rarely present.

Life changes for us all and there are opportunities to change direction if we choose to; We’re soon to become great grandparents and the reality of one of our grandchildren becoming a father has been an interesting concept! It’s a leveller when your children start having children, but when your grandchildren start having children, it feels like it’s time to embrace life even more fully.

Despite soon becoming a great grandma, it feels as if I’m only just beginning to know who I am; roles I’ve lived in the past have changed and I’m learning to adapt to the life I’ve chosen now. That’s not to say life is over…far from it! There are places we want to go and things we want to do away from the canals, so we’re making plans for new adventures too.

I’ve felt so grateful this week that I’m in a relationship at this point in my life where we share the same outlook (I won’t say goals as that sounds too ‘driven’); no relationship is perfect, but to be married to someone (for 39 years) who decides to make a loaf of bread and a rice pudding on a Friday morning (that’s 2 things a day!) is a keeper.

Being open to change in later life feels a good thing; I think my Mum would look at my life now and be pleased I’ve adopted her philosophy…after all, Mums do know best.